Have you ever played pool? Did you notice how you might be a ½ millimeter off when you tap the white ball, but by the end of the table the white ball is off course by inches? Such a little thing as a ½ a millimeter can radically change through time and space. The same thing applies to any change we want to encourage in our lives. We are actively living in time and space. Any small changes you adopt to improve yourself, will grow through time, if you keep at it.
Things that might empower you:
- Power List! Write a list of all the things that you have accomplished. Make sure you add things like, I graduated from…, I taught my child…, I am a good friend to… Find accomplishments from your education, your personal life, your work/career, and volunteer jobs. Have you every gotten a compliment about being smart, or creative, or funny? Write it down. Keep the list somewhere that you can find it and add to it as you go. This list will help on the days you feel less than. It will help you challenge your thinking, when you may be more negative than is useful.
- Leave yourself Love Notes! These aren’t love notes in the traditional format, but rather you telling yourself the things you need to hear. I am capable! I manage stress well! I am likeable! I care about people and they care about me! I am smart and getting smarter! Put these post it note messages up all around your bathroom mirror, you will have to see them at least twice a day and they will be good for you.
- Try Power Posing! Stand like Superman or Wonder Woman. Raise your hands in the Victory V and smile to the sky. Sit with your legs up on the desk and your hands behind your head like a big shot. Find a power pose and then practice it in private, but over time, you will change the testosterone and cortisol levels in your body and will develop a more powerful sense of yourself.
- Visualize! See yourself handling anything you need to do well. See yourself being successful in anything you might normally be scared of, such as talking in front of people, or in a job interview, going to a party where you don’t know people, walking into a classroom the first day, whatever might be scary. Then see yourself doing that thing with confidence.
- Let Go! It can be hard to let go of regrets, resentments or worries, it seems you’re hardly human if you don’t have a few of these. All these things are either past focused or future focused, and they take attention away from ‘now.’ And, unfortunately, the more you focus on the negative aspects of the past or the future, the harder it is to feel good about yourself and/or your direction in the present. When we focus on things we have no control over, the past especially, it’s really difficult to move forward. Looking backwards is only helpful if you are learning from it or letting go of it. The future is open and unknown, we can work to influence it in positive ways, but worry and resentments rarely get you where you want to go.
Try these tools to help you keep your energy high as you move toward your goals. We also need to support ourselves through the journey. Just like in pool, these tiny tweaks will lead you to new outcomes. As you make these small adjustment, see how they are working, if you are feeling more empowered, then make another, and then another, and another.