You will fail at 100% of the things you never try. Failure is Optional! Let’s create Success!
How many times have you wanted to do something, and the peanut gallery in your head or the peanut gallery around you, talk you right out of the idea? Then fast forward a few minutes, hours, days, weeks or years, and you still have a little annoying regret that you didn’t do try, or go after what you wanted?
There are arguably more than five steps to create success, still, if I boil them down, these are the ones that support me.
I was recently chatting with a client about applying for a job, she noticed the job advertisement in the paper and thought, I am interested in that job! Then the internal peanut gallery started up. “I’m not qualified,” “I’m not good enough,” and “I’m not ready.” Added to that was the external peanut gallery of friends saying, “Didn’t you just start a new job?” “That’s not a responsible choice.” “Why would you want to do that?” “I don’t know; it will make you look flaky on your Resume.” It derailed her; she decided, “I really shouldn’t apply,” and she let it go, and moved on. Funny thing it was still noodling around in her head.
Then a week later she sees what? Yes! She sees the same ad for the same job! And, the noodling that had been deep in her head popped right up and said, “I will regret this if I don’t apply.” So, she sent in her application and sent off her regrets.
When we chatted, she was on the calendar for an interview. No guarantees that she will get the job, but a satisfaction that she was listening to her internal voice and honoring her own desire to see what might be possible. And, isn’t that the more important lesson here. If you ignore your internal knowing, and you don’t try to get the things that excite and scare you a little bit, you stop yourself before you even know what is possible. You will fail at 100% of the things you never try. And, while not many things are guaranteed, I guarantee you this: Not trying guarantees not accomplishing!
How many times have you wanted to do something, and the peanut gallery in your head or the peanut gallery around you, talk you right out of the idea? Then fast forward a few minutes, hours, days, weeks or years and you still have a little annoying regret that you didn’t do try, or go after what you wanted?
There are arguably more than 5 steps to create success, still, if I boil them down, these are the ones that support me.
Failure is optional. Failure is a mindset; it’s an either or. By doing something like applying for a new job, or asking that interesting man/woman out for coffee, or trying a new endeavor, we don’t get a promised outcome. What we get instead is a profound internal knowing that we can stretch ourselves. We can push through our fears, and we can set our minds to try anything. If we challenge the mindset of failure and shift the story to one of experience, it can change everything about how we approach the world.
Five Steps that Create Success
- Develop trust in yourself and learn to listen to your gut. If you are going to regret not trying, then seriously, pay attention.
- Tone down the peanut gallery. We all have internal and often external voices with lots of negative perspectives. Notice when the messages are not useful, especially when all the messages are “shoulding” on you. You should do this; you shouldn’t do that. Ask yourself “why?” Then surround yourself with people who believe in you. Join a mastermind group, or get a coach. We typically have enough negative internal narratives; we rarely need to add more people to the peanut gallery. Choose people who are stretching themselves, who believe in your ability to be successful, and who support you in deciding for yourself.
- Have an open mindset. Having a flexible and open mindset gives us more room to “play,” not taking the situation so seriously and instead using it as practice. Often that shift in mindset changes our energy, and we show up happier and having more fun because we aren’t worried about failing. Instead, we are enjoying trying.
- Keep it in perspective. Hold a goal firmly and the method to accomplishing it loosely. There are very few guarantees in life, stretch yourself, find new things to try. You never know who you are going to meet or what other opportunities will show up as a result.
- Face your fears and keep on moving through them. Fear is the soul killer. It stops more endeavors before they begin than any other force in the world. Learn to put it in perspective, if there is a bear running directly at you, ok, fear is perfect. Yet, if it’s a fear of not being worthy, or good enough, or whatever, get a few more data point and challenge that part of yourself. Breathe through it, and then decide what your next step is.
The more you try, the better your odds of success. The more you try, the better your odds of finding new opportunities. So, go out and be successful!